Finding Roots

Sometimes the best way to better know myself is to remember who I was. To that end I have made the trek to Hawaii where I grew up and will revisit my past and perhaps lead me to a more productive future. That's my story of why I'm here and I'm sticking to it.

My sister and I arrived a couple of hours apart on Sunday Sept 7. The next item on the agenda is Tuesday Sept 15 around 10P when I get on a plane to return to Iowa. Otherwise, everything else is negotiable.

I can't think of anyone else in the world who would enjoy being with us and understand what is going on. We are spending time seeing the most mundane things, talking about the most boring subjects, and being excited about what we see for all the wrong reasons. No one else would what we are doing and seeing.

I have been back several times since going away to college. She hasn't been. But it is interesting to see her look at something and remember it though she hasn't thought about it for almost 40 years. For instance, on the way from the airport we drove by the old Love's bakery where we both remembered a field trip and getting little loves of bread. After this amount of time, we don't remember if it was for Pathfinders or school. And there is probably no one in the world now who can fill us in.

Mom and Dad are already prominent in our conversations. Neither of us has much reason to think about them in our real lives now after 30 years. But now that we're together and in this place of common experience they come up. And in a different light than when we were kids. Somehow more human, actually bigger.

Our relationships to childhood friends will be reinterpreted. Dr. Charles Yamashiro had always been somewhat of a background thought since it was his kids I was friends with and his wife was the active parent who was always inviting us over, leading out in church youth activities, and generally the visible, very strong influence in our and many others' lives. But I called last night to see if they would be able to go out with us to eat while we are here. He referred me to Mrs. Yamashiro as she would have their activity schedule. But somehow I got to talking with him about his experience during the war. He and several of his friends, including our family dentist Dr. Joseph Yamamoto, were rounded up in 1942 while they were studying at PUC and taken to an internment camp at Merced, CA. In camp he was made the Sanitary Officer, paid $16/mo. He referred to others who were teachers and pastors who were paid $19/mo. The SDA Church became involved and got the guys out to continue their studies - he first at Union College in Nebraska, then applying at the University of Saint Louis for medical school where he was not accomodated for Sabbath observance, then University of Minnesota before being able to go to Loma Linda Unversity where he finished up. After all these years, I did not know that.

What else might I find here.

Jesus Thoughts: Take No Thought

We think we are the first generation that really worries. Things are so tenuous, so much could happen so quickly that would forever change my life, if I have a flat and am late to work my life as I know it will be over. Am I in the right career? What am I going to do if I can't pay back that credit card soon?

True, there are things we need to be concerned about. But anxiety and depression seems to be growing. We seem more and more out of control. With so many inputs - computer, internet, phone, blackberry, television - we are taking in so much we can't process it all. We don't have time to resolve things so they build into open loops.

But think back to a time when a farmer would go out to his field, knowing that storm he saw on the horizon was going to flatten his crop. That crop was food for the next year and the surplus was where he would get money to buy the staples like sugar, salt, clothes, and even seed for next year. Or when the father who cleans the streets is run over and killed by a carriage leaving a wife and children in a tenement with no means of support. Or when a poor carpenter in an occupied land sees a downturn in business leaving in question where next week's food, much less next month's or next year's, is coming from.

Stresses vary from one era to the next. Yet the condition is the same. Things we can't control are building all around us.

Enter Jesus and His blueprint for life, His vision of the future. Matthew 6: 25-34. Ending his description of anxiety-ridden conditions he says "Don't worry about tomorrow. Tomorrow brings it's own worries. But seek first the Kingdom and His righteousness..."

The Kingdom He speaks about is often described as heaven. If I accept that, He is saying "don't worry about things here on earth. Someday you will die and go to heaven then everything will be alright. So just make sure you get there."

But in looking at His whole message and His actions I don't think that is where He is going with this. I don't see an instruction to not think about tomorrow or your problems. His response is more one of priorities: Think of this first. Then the other will come. There's a time and a place.

Stress helps motivate us to move from one point to another. That is not bad. I appreciate the teaching that reminds me to place it all in context.

Why Pain

God may see different priorities for us. Pain/stress/tension are seen by us as evil and as something to be avoided. But we seem to require stress and pain to move us to solve problems, change direction, Otherwise the body/mind tends to stay at rest. Perhaps pain/stress/sorrow/sadness is the force that comes between me at rest and the spiritual experience He provides as the superior position so as to avoid atrophy and inaction.

Probably among other things, i see Jesus suffering and death as a affirmation that death will not be the worst thing to happen. In His case, bowing down to Satan and being done with the pain would have been the worst. I just wonder how long thousands of children will have to starve for His point to be made obvious enough to produce the action in me to do HIS work.

Nonsense That Could Make Sense

Would it increase survival rates in airline crashes if the seats faced backwards? They seldom back into things at a high rate of speed. A sudden slowdown would be much more comfortable pressed against the seat rather than being pulled out of straining seatbelts. Remember, it was my idea.